More Questions

1. How often do you get to physically be together with Big Bad?


I've been physically with Big Bad once. We live in different countries, thousands of miles from each other. I'd like it if it were more often, so would he but it's almost impossible.
 
Having said that, we don't really focus (usually) on not getting that physical togetherness. We focus on the relationship we do have. Which is comprised essentially of online, phone, webcam, chat, email.
 
2. Do you and Big Bad live together?

Nope - see above. We spend a lot of time together, but not physically. I live with a husband and kids in Canada. He lives with a girlfriend in the USA.

3. Do you find it difficult to keep this part of your life separate from your real life?


Sometimes I do. Sometimes there is spillover into my real life. He wants a little spillover and I don't say no to him, from the beginning he has wanted to be part of my day to day routine and he is pretty interwoven there. But he also respects my family life and my job and that threatening either of those things threatens our relationship, so he doesn't take any demands too far into my real life. He doesn't have me naked at the office (at least not too often) or around my kids (ever) and my kids and colleagues and friends would not ever guess that I am a submissive. They'd probably guess Domme if they did make a guess.

Sometimes it's hard to shift in the blink of an eye from work-domme or mommy-domme to His sub (or the other way around). Which means that sometimes I bring that forceful bossy woman to him and he puts me in my place. And if he knows that I have a work thing that I am nervous about, where I need to be on my game, he doesn't make me feel submissive or humiliated.
 
4.  I know your questions are probably piling up lol, but...What have you found to be the most challenging aspects of your submission?
 
Intellectually the most challenging thing has always been reconciling my submission with being a feminist. They SO don't go together. And this was not how I grew up thinking my relationships would look. But it is who I am, and this is the relationship that I want. So somehow it all has to work right?
 
In terms of me actually submitting, the most challenging thing is submitting. It's actually doing it when I don't want to. When I think it's not fair. When I think my Dom is being a fucker. Cause sometimes I do think that and there aren't any time outs. Cause sometimes I would way rather say "No" (or "fuck you, you selfish bastard") than "Yes Sir", but I still have to say "Yes Sir". "Fuck you" turns out to be something that really pisses him off and elicits retribution. Our particular relationship doesn't really allow for time outs.