Can I make my own submission?
Hmmm. I don't know. Why would I want to?
Well, if he wasn't around. Could I then?
Maybe. Maybe I could. Why would I want to again?
Because he'd like it. I guess he would at least. If he noticed.
But if he's not around, would it matter? Would he care that I was submissive?
Yeah a bit maybe. If he noticed.
So I'd get a bit of benefit for maybe a bit more effort?
Maybe.
So how would I do that?
Meditate on submissiveness? Or read some of the things I've written when I feel really submissive?
Okay, I could do that. And it might make me feel more submissive. But then what?
I guess then I'd want him to play along. To take the dominant part.
Ummm.
So no, I guess I won't bother. At least not today.
"Can I make my own submission...Why would I want to...Maybe I could...would it matter...Would he care...If he noticed...how would I do that...it might make me feel more submissive...I'd want him to play along...take the dominant part...I guess I won't bother..."
ReplyDeleteAll of which makes me wonder -- does "submission" occur as part of a relationship dynamic? Is it really something that can only be done reflexively with a partner who is carrying their part of the tune?
I feel like I've been doing it "solo" for a good long while now, but then, I suspect that what "it" is for me might not be what "it" is for you -- or even what "it" would have been for me once upon a time.
Thoughts?
swan