carpe diem

where to go now?

Monday, October 3, 2016

So Then...

This blog doesn't really seem like the right place for me to write anymore. 

It's funny because I felt like an exile for ages, and I was so happy to get back here and writing, and touch base with some of you again and yet... 

Things have changed for me. Relationships have changed. I'm changing. 

Writing here kind of feels like I have to conform to the expectations of who and what I was here a long time ago. Writing here got dangerous too, and it still doesn't feel like a safe space.

And it seems like I'm struggling to write here, I haven't written in almost a month and... I miss it and miss you and your comments. But yet I'm not writing. 

I feel sometimes like I'm struggling with craziness. Up and down and ... yes I know I always was, but now more than ever. Lots of uncertainty. 

So ... maybe this is a starter post. A stub. And I will come back often. Maybe. 

Maybe this post will open everything up again and things will flow. 

Or maybe I need to move on and write somewhere else. 

Or both? 

Of course, if you have questions, or suggestions or motivating things you want to say to me, to encourage me to write and share, just jump in and inspire me. 

Or maybe I will find my muse again. Wish me luck?


  1. We could always talk about Donald Trump....

    1. we could Mick, but that sounds like a "You problem" and what would we say?

  2. Hey sin it's nice to hear from you again even though it isn't the happiest of circumstances. I always enjoyed your writing, and hope that you will find that safe space to continue. It always helped me sort through things but then life does go in phases. I stopped writing because I found I didn't really need to sort through things in the same way anymore. I definitely identify with your dilemma on struggling to write and but missing it!

    On the release I don't have many words of wisdom I'm afraid. It sucks, and it takes time.

    Wishing you the best.

  3. From one writer to another, I truly hope you will continue to breathe life into words, connecting those who can relate and would otherwise feel alone.

  4. You know i'll follow you wherever you go, but it seems to me that finding more of your voice here could have some power. i'm looking forward to getting to know you better. Even if it did take me a month to realize you were posting again. :)

  5. Having recently spent a good deal of time considering moving, I'm going to offer the opinion that this is still your place, and it has been here for eons in blog years--I'd say keep it.

    We evolve and change, shit happens Our stories and what we need to write also evolves and changes. Just because it's not the same story you wrote before, doesn't mean its not still your story--these are still your pages, and any words you choose to write are perfect for here because they are yours.