carpe diem

where to go now?

Sunday, February 9, 2014


Mick asked a question in the comments on the last post which makes me realize that most of you probably don't know me very well.

His comment expressed surprise that I'm a pleaser in my non-sub role as well.

Yes, I am.

I think I'm a fairly dominant pleaser. I want things to go well, I want everyone to be happy, and I'm often bossy about how that happens. Because I always think I know best. Which makes me a really bossy sub.

I'm an extrovert. I have lots of friends. I'm a bit of an organizer there. I love parties and bars and large groups. I'm outgoing and loud and funny (I think). If you told my friends I was into D/s, they would definitely think I was on the Domme side.

I'm a manager in my job and I have one employee who really wants to think of me on the Domme side. He's always telling people he's afraid of me. He certainly gives the impression of me getting my way with high boots and a riding crop. He likes bossy women.

And yes, despite all that, I am a pleaser. I want everyone to be happy. Yeah, I know my Dom is rolling his eyes - maybe a couple of the rest of you too! Okay, sometimes I'm a confrontational bratty pleaser.

I'm very submissive in the bedroom. I don't even like to think about being the boss there. I've done it at least in role play, I think because I AM a pleaser, but I didn't like it. I put handcuffs on someone once, thinking that it might be really exciting to focus on teasing and pleasing someone to orgasm while they couldn't change things and get away, but really, it wasn't that exciting. I don't think either of us could get past the idea that I had the key.

I want it to be perfect for the person I'm with. And I like to be swept off my feet. There are some pretty specific things I like, and I don't mind telling them. But I like it even better, knowing they are getting what they want when they want it. 


  1. that is a rare glimpse. I think we create a certain impression in these blogs. An audience may tend to forget that this is only one side, one facet of the multifaceted and somewhat flawed people we are.

    Thanks for sharing Sin

  2. Actually I wasn't surprised. It would make sense, did make sense, to me that you want to makes most people happy, and that it extends not just to your intimate relationships. Molly is that way too.